June 30, 2003
Any Dune fans out there?
The end of this thread of dullery is hysterical.
Moving day
One of my neighbors moved out. I'm happy because they had 5 cars due to the unreal amount of people living there. Parking will hopefully be a little better.
I saw the guy who bought the house while I was letting my dog poop in my front yard. He looked like he was mid/late twenties, white, likely a virgin, and had what looked like a unix shirt on.... in my experience, that means he probably works for the CIA.
First time I have EVER laughed out loud reading slashdot:
WARNING this is the geekiest:
I actually, honestly laughed out loud in my house when reading this comment on slashdot:
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"Plus, his fellow coders are a petty, snide-commenting bunch"
Forgive me, but when I read that, I thought this: /*Yeah, sure, this code will work. *snicker*/
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If you don't think that's funny... well, good for you.
I don't like this....
I'm an American. I don't like the idea of being taxed by the European Union when I buy stuff online. Do you?
June 25, 2003
In other news
Severed finger available on EBAY!
I think this guy has watched that movie (Four Rooms? Something like that...) too many times.
odd, odd dream
Ok, so I had an odd dream this morning. It started out in my ocean front house (who knew?) and I was watching cartoons with a moody friend of mine (for sake of the story, let's call him corey) and my brother. It was afternoon. We decided to go out that night. Corey and my brother left to go to their respective houses (I wonder if they have a secret ocean-front house?).
Here's where it starts to get odd:
Cristen and I decide we have to go to target for some reason before we go out. We go there and it was more like a K-Mart than a Target but anyway. I get this feeling my brother is going to be flaky about going out because he had promised multiple people to go do different things that night (don't know how I knew this). Cristen and I start finding all these cheap DVD movie packs like Die Hard, etc. Then a guy who works in the store starts yelling my name. I look over, tell him that he's looking for me. He tells me I have a call. I take the call at one of the registers but then they usher me into an employee lounge of some sort. It's corey.
(c) "Why didn't you tell me Karoyln emailed you?"
(me) "I did"
(c) "Why didn't you email her back?"
(me) "Because I told you."
(c) "Oh, ok."
The conversation just goes on and on without details here, just a ever growing feeling of weird because corey won't get off the damn phone and I feel weird being in an employee lounge. Time passes, employees start introducing me to other employees... just odd. The employees make plans to go out after they get off work. (still on phone) Employees get off work and leave. During this whole thing there's a constant influx of employees brushing by me and swarming around me like rats staring at me. I have to keep switching from the cordless phone to the corded phone. Corey won't get off the phone. I'm really annoyed. Finally everyone leaves.
.... time passes... still on phone but don't remember what we're talking about, just remember I kept saying: "Can't we talk about this when we meet to go out tonight?"...
Two guys come in a back entrance to the lounge. They're dragging something that's kicking and moving a lot. They finally let it go pushing it towards an inner office door. It's a big, angry great dane. The dog goes in the office. They follow. Then they go through some back door in the inner office. The dog notices me and starts barking and running at me. I finally hang up the phone and run to the door. I open the door and try to jump through but my jeans get stuck on the door. I struggle. Can't get through. The great dane bites me. I scream thinking "fucking corey".
Then I woke up. I never remember dreams but I told Cristen about it right as I woke up so I actually remember it now. How freaking odd is that? Just weird.
June 18, 2003
First tempting mail offer in a long time...
12 issues for 12 dollars, plus free gift... I haven't has a playboy subscription since my dad had one "for himself" while I was in high school.
June 17, 2003
It hurts when I pee charlie brown...
Boy pees beetles... doctors confused.
June 12, 2003
Wonder if I can rig up something like this in my basement...
Ah, duct tape...
What if I like being fat?
START RANT
Ok, I don't like being fat... but I realize that it's my choice. If I wanted to, I could exercise 5 hours a day and be slim. Would a tax on junk food or VIDEO GAMES (fuckers) encourage me to do it? Hell no. In fact, I'm one of the fat, lazy, stubborn, arrogant Americans that so many hate. I enjoy my freedom, my choice. I like the fact that I can smoke a pack of cigarrettes a day and slowly kill my lungs. I like the fact that I can sit at home, drinking beer, eating junk food and playing video games all weekend. I like the fact that I can call liberals idiots when they propose taxes like this one. I like the fact that I don't have to wait in line for bread. I like the fact that I'm not forced to worship something I don't believe in or march in protest of something I don't care about because a dictator is going to kill my family if I don't. I like the fact that I'm an American.
END RANT.
June 11, 2003
Games cause violence my ass!
Game + vibrator = good for you, good for her
June 09, 2003
Damn dog
So, I went to work this morning forgetting that one of the programs I needed to work on today was most up to date on my laptop and NOT on my work computer. So, around lunch, I decided to run some errands and then go home to get the most recent version of the application. Good thing I did just that. When I openned the door, my dog had been bad as usual, tearing up random plastic bags, tossing around my game boy (yes, this pisses me off immensely - he's done it twice now... apparently he likes the canvas case that it's in...), etc. Well during his separation anxiety fit, he apparently put his paws up on my stove to fuck around with the empty pizza box that was up there. In doing so he turned on the stove top gas. Luckily, he didn't hit it far enough to spark and light the pizza box on fire. He did however suceed in filling the entire house with natural gas. When I openned the door the gas was so bad it made me cough and cover my face as I ran around the house openning windows and doors. After the gas had lessened, I turned on a ceiling fan next to two open windows. The light on the ceiling fan must have sparked because flame shot out of it quickly. Luckily, again, the gas had dispersed enough so as not to do anything other than make me flinch and yell: "fucking dog!" I called my boss and told him I'd be working at home for the rest of the day seeing as how I had all the windows and doors open and would have to keep them that way for a few hours. He said: "Sure, and then did the dog eat your car keys?" He was just fucking with me, but still... I have to admit, it is an unbelievable story. Fucking dog. Crate bound once more.
June 08, 2003
About Schmidt
Story: There's this guy. He's old. His life sucks. It gets worse. He does some soul searching. Accepts life sucks and can't do anything about it. Accepts he's going to die soon. Life gets worse. The end.
Review: Wow... boring. I want my three dollars and the two hours of my life back.
June 03, 2003
June 02, 2003
Two things I can no longer blame on me being fat:
Zelda - Gamecube
Golden Sun - Game Boy Advance
Guess once I pick up the next Golden Sun and find a new console game, I can continue my path of the sloth.